The MCG was abuzz last night with speculation and rumour over how England's plans for Australia were leaked to the media. Team England said it had launched an investigation; that it was concerned about a possible security breach surrounding their dressing room; that police might be called in; and that Cricket Australia and the International Cricket Council were also deeply disturbed.

But at last it can be revealed just what dastardly means were employed in order to have the England manifesto find its way into the public domain. Somebody dropped it on the ground and then someone else picked it up.

England has seven sets of plans for all Australian batsmen, printed on A4 paper, laminated, and stuck on its dressing room wall.

They include strategies such as bowling Matthew Hayden dot balls to mess with his ego and tempt him into big shots, and bowling a bouncer towards the throat of local hero Shane Warne.
Yesterday, a copy of the plans was emailed to ABC radio. England team management later reacted by saying the item had been pilfered by someone. But it appears the real reason lay with someone from the England camp who dropped a photocopy of the plans while walking through the stadium.

"I found it on the ground in the members area," cricket enthusiast Nick Ruthry said last night.
"I'd heard the ABC commentators saying they were wondering what the England plans were, so I thought I'd help them out."

Ruthry said he had not meant to cause trouble.

"I only wanted to make sure Warney didn't cop one in the throat," he laughed.

The plans include colour codes to remind bowlers of the height to bowl at the Australians, with blue for bails the first plan for every batsman except Brett Lee, who is considered suspect off his hip.

As a second plan bowlers are meant to bowl at three-quarter stump height to all but two batsmen — Ricky Ponting (hip), and Michael Hussey. It seemed there was only one plan for Hussey — to aim at the bails.

One of the most striking features of the plan, however, is the number of question marks.

Not only does it show Team England's bad punctuation (the use of capitals and some spelling could also be addressed), but it will again make Australia believe its opponents are not as well prepared as they were last year.

England believe Michael Clarke is a "poor puller" of deliveries pitched on the stumps, and that he has a weak grip on the bat which could lead to catches at cover or mid-wicket. The first plan for Warne is the "throat bouncer (surprise)" while Glenn McGrath might be chuffed England considers him a dangerous enough batsmen that it should give him an early bumper.

What started out with the makings of a scandal likely to be dubbed "Plangate" soon descended from mystery into farce, when Matthew Hoggard saw the funny side.

Hoggard said some other English heroes, Inspector Morse and Miss Marple, could be called in, but said the publication of the plans didn't concern him personally.

"I just close my eyes and whang it down anyway …," he said.

Asked if England was planning to steal Australia's plans — since coach John Buchanan has so far mysteriously failed to slip a copy under the door of a journalist as he often does — Hoggard bluntly replied: "It wouldn't help us." SMH Direct Link